Its been 2 years...though seems like yesterday..
My mentor understands the depth of my life so much that he commemorated this day as WORLD IKEDA KAYO KAI day...when i will be celebrating with thousands of YWDs around the world towards a glorious future without having the time to feel bad about my personal loss....the entire day's activity, the joy...the prayer, the happiness lifted my life condition to such an extent that Loss is still there...but the pain is not.. :)in fact Sensei says-- "Death will come to each of us some day. We can die having fought hard for our beliefs and convictions, or we can die having failed to do so. Since the reality of death is the same in either case, isn't it far better that we set out on our journey toward the next existence in high spirits and with a bright smile on our faces-knowing that in everything we did, we did the very best we could, thrilling with the sense "That was truly an interesting life"?"
I miss you baba...big time..
But what has become a tradition that every 4th June ( when he set off for his magnificent journey of eternity)that i report my victory to my Mentor and to you,Father.
"dekho ami barchhi daddy" ( hey wait!! i have come back to my original waist size of 28!)
dekho ami e bochhor arektu boro holam! ebochhor arektu responsibility fulfill korlam. jano?!ami ekhon computer er catridge nije nije kinte jai.me being technologically challenged, it is a big deal... ;)
[onek kichhu baba ke likhte ichhe kore, kintu bhabi chhelemanushi hoye jabe. tar cheye borong "kaje" kore dekhai tate amaro onek beshi fulfilling lage! Next year ill report more and more victory. ]
Tumi nei. tomar ostitto shobshomoy ekta VACUUM er moton kaj kore thik -i...gola ta byatha ekhono kore..kintu e shob kichhur modhyeo jeta hoy anondo...that I HAVENT FAILED YOU AS YET...and i wont. rather every day i fight, i fight never to be defeated and to make you proud. Because i am YOUR daughter..i am My MUFASA's SIMBA! and i remember who 'I AM'...i am still a cub may be..but its only a matter of time, when your little cub will grow up to a majestic Lion!!! ( i dont use gender div here)
The path of Lion is lonely.A Lion walks it alone, because its independent and i have realised that all the more in last 2 months...
Some of my closest friends & relatives (blood relatives!) dont remember..some do..but forgot..some remembered but didnt know what to say...i understand...each of them..i dont expect anymore.Because i am YOUR daughter, i have seen your uncrushable stamina..your magnanimous heart and your monumental dignity and i aspire to have that..most importantly i have SENSEI..and trust me baba, he loves me just the way you did! :) or 'do'...
In this infinite eternal cycle of life and death, i salute you BABA...i just miss your physical presence, that;s it. you are omnipresent in my BEING.
Buddhism talks of Happiness in Life and Happiness in Death...i had seen both in you..
:)
I love you
